It's the Circular Firing Squad of Flying Attack Monkeys!
Recipe Malfunction

The Darth Side

Chad Orzel clearly needs additional college administrative responsibilities. He finds this:

The Darth Side: Memoirs of a Monster: 'Make ready the jump to hyperspace.'

'But Lord Vader,' whinnied Admiral Ozzel, 'the armada is already moving along a prescribed route...'

I withered him with a stare, my hands on my belt.

He ordered the helm to replot our course, and notified the fleet commanders. Then he turned and asked as contritely as he could manage, 'May I at least know what leads you to suspect Themoth will yield results, my Lord?'

'You may ask,' I told him, turning away to the glass. 'As an ant may ask the sun why it shines. It is beyond you, Admiral. See to your duty.'

Ozzel hesitated. 'Sir,' he said crisply and turned on heel.

Do you want to know what the worst part is? My left leg is still on the fritz. Whose trachea do you have to crush with your mind to get a little service around here?

Posted by Darth Vader

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